This is to All the Mommas
So, I had an epiphany today...but let me start at the beginning...
Lately the Lord has been dealing with me on the way I see and treat others. Specifically those who are difficult, or whom I have had disagreements with. He has been teaching me to see them as He does, and that everyone is worth kindness despite the circumstances. Kindness should always be my reaction. It needs to become instinctive. Even with seemingly minor situations; like at the grocery store when I see someone I kind of recognize, but I don't think they know me. Instead of avoiding a possible awkward situation, it's better to offer a wave or smile, and choose kindness. Because if they do recognize me and notice I avoid them, what does that say?
So, back to my epiphany, this morning as I was finishing my quiet time, I was thinking on this and motherhood. And it hit me...right in the gut. Not only should I regard others with kindness first, but how much more should I regard my own children that way! Mommas out there, I don't know, I may be the only one, but there have been times (too many if I'm honest) that I have treated or spoke to my children in a way that I would never do to someone else. I am embarrassed and appalled at myself that this is true. But it is. In times where I could be exhibiting patience and self-control, I choose instead to be lazy and avoid the hard work of controlling my temper when I need to the most. So why is that? Get ready for another gut punch. Because my kiddos know that I love them. I don't have to try to constantly convince them, or worry about how they feel or think about me. Because I know they love me too. So many times I take that truth for granted at the expense of treating them however I want in the moment, without there being immediate consequences to me. However there are consequences, aren't there? How will my words today lead to distrust in the future, or alienation and fragmented relationships? Ugh, #majormomfail!!!
But there is hope right?
For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth.
Psalm 71:5
Thank you, Lord, that there is hope. Not only do I need the Lord to show me how to treat those outside my home, but so much more inside my home. May my words be wrapped in kindness. My rebukes regarded as teaching. And, may I pour encouragements onto my children as they grow and learn to navigate life. So how do I start? Well, I would recommend first not only remembering there is hope, but also forgiveness. We need to not only ask forgiveness from our Heavenly Father and our children, but we also need to offer forgiveness to ourselves and get rid of the mom guilt that so heavily overtakes us.
There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
Romans 8:1
This is something we will need to remind ourselves of often as we walk through motherhood, and life in general. Just because we fail, we are not failures. We are not defined by that, but we are defined by who Christ says we are. Then, moving forward, we need to adopt strategies to help us in the moment. Whether it's counting to 10 in our heads (or out loud lol), taking a few breaths, or taking a mom time out to cool off. Whatever works to help you be mindful of what you are saying and doing, before you say or do it. Maybe it can even be saying a scripture out loud in the moment; which would not only be a reminder to you, but also a testimony to your kids, of who you depend on when things are hard and you need help. But may I suggest not using one from when Jesus cleanses the temple...I think that may send a different message lol.
Let us be encouraged, as followers of Christ, that we are not alone and left to wallow in our failures and sin. But we are empowered through the Holy Spirit to manifest the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. It is not impossible to live this out. But it takes prayer and work.
Lets do this!
Lately the Lord has been dealing with me on the way I see and treat others. Specifically those who are difficult, or whom I have had disagreements with. He has been teaching me to see them as He does, and that everyone is worth kindness despite the circumstances. Kindness should always be my reaction. It needs to become instinctive. Even with seemingly minor situations; like at the grocery store when I see someone I kind of recognize, but I don't think they know me. Instead of avoiding a possible awkward situation, it's better to offer a wave or smile, and choose kindness. Because if they do recognize me and notice I avoid them, what does that say?
So, back to my epiphany, this morning as I was finishing my quiet time, I was thinking on this and motherhood. And it hit me...right in the gut. Not only should I regard others with kindness first, but how much more should I regard my own children that way! Mommas out there, I don't know, I may be the only one, but there have been times (too many if I'm honest) that I have treated or spoke to my children in a way that I would never do to someone else. I am embarrassed and appalled at myself that this is true. But it is. In times where I could be exhibiting patience and self-control, I choose instead to be lazy and avoid the hard work of controlling my temper when I need to the most. So why is that? Get ready for another gut punch. Because my kiddos know that I love them. I don't have to try to constantly convince them, or worry about how they feel or think about me. Because I know they love me too. So many times I take that truth for granted at the expense of treating them however I want in the moment, without there being immediate consequences to me. However there are consequences, aren't there? How will my words today lead to distrust in the future, or alienation and fragmented relationships? Ugh, #majormomfail!!!
But there is hope right?
For you, O Lord, are my hope, my trust, O Lord, from my youth.
Psalm 71:5
Thank you, Lord, that there is hope. Not only do I need the Lord to show me how to treat those outside my home, but so much more inside my home. May my words be wrapped in kindness. My rebukes regarded as teaching. And, may I pour encouragements onto my children as they grow and learn to navigate life. So how do I start? Well, I would recommend first not only remembering there is hope, but also forgiveness. We need to not only ask forgiveness from our Heavenly Father and our children, but we also need to offer forgiveness to ourselves and get rid of the mom guilt that so heavily overtakes us.
There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
Romans 8:1
This is something we will need to remind ourselves of often as we walk through motherhood, and life in general. Just because we fail, we are not failures. We are not defined by that, but we are defined by who Christ says we are. Then, moving forward, we need to adopt strategies to help us in the moment. Whether it's counting to 10 in our heads (or out loud lol), taking a few breaths, or taking a mom time out to cool off. Whatever works to help you be mindful of what you are saying and doing, before you say or do it. Maybe it can even be saying a scripture out loud in the moment; which would not only be a reminder to you, but also a testimony to your kids, of who you depend on when things are hard and you need help. But may I suggest not using one from when Jesus cleanses the temple...I think that may send a different message lol.
Let us be encouraged, as followers of Christ, that we are not alone and left to wallow in our failures and sin. But we are empowered through the Holy Spirit to manifest the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. It is not impossible to live this out. But it takes prayer and work.
Lets do this!
I will not leave you as orphans;
I will come to you.
- John 14:18
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